fashion and magazines and then some wondering

Went to the hairdresser and as usual, leafed through the fashion magazines pile. I've notice that my leafing today was quick, one magazine, then another, a third one and in barely no time, a fourth, a fifth. So I've stopped to think and found myself  involved in self talking: it seems dear that nothing is right with you, your eye lashes are not, your skin is not, your nails are not, your hair is not, your bag, your shoes, your clothes, not, not, not, and your legs are not long enough, and you are not tanned enough or white enough, and your weight is not, and your food is not and your lipstick is not and, and----

You are just not defined enough or futuristic enough or soft enough or enough of an object, is short

And then I moved to the kiss as it seem a very trendy thing to do as an object these days in magazines, and I looked at it and asked my self if this a kiss worth kissing at all as hands are not empty and knees are not melting, and instead a bag is held high tightly or a shoe is raised in great calculation. And I think a kiss as such should be terminated at the spot when any kiss is involved as it doesn't seems worthwhile to kiss at all,  and i won't even speak of the three days wait until  the guy will grow a male-male like hair on his face as that seems as a complete waste of the time that can be used for a good kiss.

Where are those fashion magazines going with this Cxxx, i've actually kept asking myself---

the models and the actresses, even they are not themselves in those photos but a photoshop version of themselves, no brand what so ever that can't buy its way through into those pages is not presented, instead of fashion i have looked at money bought commercials in all ways possible- photo shoots, plain advertisements, seemingly content articles things and so on.

Let me confess- I love fashion, i think its creative and powerful yet my hair is not 'it', my skin is not 'it', my clothes are not 'it', my bag is not 'it', my shoes are not 'it', my food is not 'it', my legs are not 'it', my body is not 'it', my hair is not 'it', my nails are not 'it', my drinks are not 'it',  my kiss is not 'it' and, even my beautiful car doesn't seems to be it as its not sparkly nor clean enough, and on and on the list goes and still i happen to surprisingly live (surprise indeed!!) and even come back to tell that that i am not a photo shop automated version of a fashion magazine's money bought editor or director's whatever industry mind. 

Or if i'll say it in plain fashion- I love fashion but in those glossy seemingly perfect magazines i don't happen to find any fashion at all. 

p.s. Not long ago, at the hair dresser's I saw a whole campaign in one of the magazines about Organic Hair, page after page after page it went on and I was clueless.  I've asked the hair dresser then what is organic hair. He looked at me and was quiet for a while, went on with the hair cut, was quiet some more and then said- I have no idea at all, and a good answer was that.

Fashion, for me its about projecting my inner feel and mood, about enhancing myself, fashion is life itself walking the streets, my heart beating, the movements i make, the expression of my body and face, and every morning when dressing up i will ask myself- is this right, is this the mood.
Those magazines I saw today were about creating a dream world that even the models and actors/actresses that are shown in them can not enter. It might all be another religion, a dead zone perhaps it is but the beating of the heart it is not.